Drugs and sex

There are different ways that sex and drugs can affect each other.

People may:

• feel they want to have sex when they take a drug - some drugs increase sex drive or lower inhibitions
• have problems with sex - some drugs decrease sex drive, cause erection problems or prevent orgasms
• take drugs on purpose before or during sex - this can be called sexualised drug use (SDU) or chemsex

There are things you can do to look after yourself and your partners if you could have sex when you take drugs.

Consent and drug use

Consent is an ongoing, mutual and freely-given agreement to take part in sexual activity. Consent applies to everyone.

Some people use drugs during sex and feel they can consent while using drugs. But there is often a point where they lose their ability to consent.

If you want to have sex while using drugs, always check and keep checking that your partner has the capacity to consent. Agree that you can both stop at any time.

If you are unsure someone has the capacity to consent, stop.

Signs someone cannot consent include if they:

• cannot answer a direct question about if they want to continue
• cannot make decisions because of the effect of drugs - the drug may cause them to do things they would not usually do
• are given drugs without their knowledge (spiking)
• are forced or coerced into taking drugs
• lose consciousness

Sexual consent

Effects of drugs on sex

Different drugs can have different effects on sex and intimacy.

Common effects include:

• feeling affectionate or connected to other people
• feeling confident
• lower inhibitions - you may do things you usually would not do
• increased sex drive
• loss of sex drive
• problems getting an erection
• improved erections
• relaxing muscles in your anus or vagina
• problems having an orgasm

You can find out more about the effects of specific drugs in our drugs A to Z.

Having sex on drugs

People may take drugs before or during sex to:

• feel more pleasure
• lower inhibitions or feel more confident
• make sex last longer
• relax muscles for anal sex or fisting

Common drugs people take for sex include:

• G (GHB and GBL)
• crystal meth
• synthetic cathinones such as mephedrone
• poppers (amyl nitrite)
• sildenafil (Viagra)
• cocaine

Chemsex

Chemsex is when people take different combinations of drugs before or during sex. Chemsex parties can last several hours or days.

Drugs used for chemsex are usually called chems and include:

• G (GHB or GBL) - often called Gina
• crystal meth - often called Tina
• mephedrone - this may be called M, meow meow, meph

But people may use other drugs too. For example, cocaine, ketamine or MDMA.

Chemsex is more common between gay, bisexual and men who have sex with men (gbMSM).

People say they take part in chemsex because they want to:

• feel more confident and free to have sex - some people may fear rejection or have shame around sex in other situations
• have sex that lasts longer or feels better
• connect with other people or feel part of a group
• reduce feelings of loneliness or isolation

Risks of mixing drugs and sex

Mixing drugs and sex or having chemsex can have different effects on people.

The effects depend on the types of drugs you use or how often you mix drugs and sex.

Some risks include:

• mental health difficulties such as anxiety, depression or psychosis
• heart problems
• sexually transmitted infections (STIs)
• blood to blood infections such as HIV, hepatitis C and hepatitis B
• dependency - after regular use you may get cravings for the drugs or feel you need them to have sex
• negative sexual experiences or problems enjoying sex without drugs
• overdose or other drug emergencies - G has a high risk of overdose

The risks are increased if you:

• do not use condoms
• inject (slam) the drugs you use
• mix drugs and sex often
• take part in chemsex often
• use other drugs as a way to cope with comedowns
• have mental health difficulties or a family history of mental health difficulties
• share equipment to snort or inject drugs

Drugs and sexual assault

Sexual assault is any sexual act that you did not consent to, or are forced into against your will. This includes rape.

If you have been sexually assaulted, it was not your fault.

Sexual assault can happen at sex parties or during any kind of drug use. Sexual assault is a crime, no matter who commits it or where it happens.

A sexual assault treatment unit (SATU) is a safe place to go if you have been raped or sexually assaulted. Try to get help as soon as you can.

Help after rape and sexual assault

You do not have to report the assault to the gardaí if you do not want to. SATUs can store forensic samples for up to 1 year. This can give you time to think about what happened and if you want to report the assault.

Looking after your sexual health and wellbeing

There are things you can do to look after your sexual health and wellbeing if you often use drugs for sex.

It is important to:

• learn about your risks and plan to reduce them
• follow harm-reduction advice during sessions
• take care of yourself in the days after

Plan to reduce your risks

Before a session:

• learn about the drugs you use and know what to do in an emergency
• talk to a GP or STI clinic about how to get medicines to prevent HIV
• always carry condoms if you use drugs that increase your sex drive such as crystal meth or MDMA
• think about how you feel - you are more at risk of negative effects if you feel low or anxious
• tell a friend where you are going if you are meeting someone new
• ask a friend to call or text you and have an exit strategy if you want to leave a situation
• measure the drugs and only bring what you want to take - this is especially important with G
• store any G in a labelled bottle
• bring extra lube - when sex lasts longer, there is a higher risk of friction and tears
• talk with your sexual partners about what you want and do not want to do before you take drugs
• agree with your partners how long you want the session to last
• agree with your partners that you will call the emergency services if someone goes under or shows signs of an overdose
• make sure you have enough time to recover afterwards and healthy food options at home

Find out more about needle exchange services and reducing risks if you inject drugs.

Reducing your risk during a session

During a session:

• start with a low test amount and go slow
• keep track of how much you are using - you could set alarms on your phone
• use condoms every time you have sex
• use dental dams
• use a condom once - never reuse it
• keep checking consent with your partners - make sure they still consent and are able to consent
• take time to check how you feel - use your exit strategy if you need to
• do not share needles or any equipment to snort drugs
• do not let someone else inject you or measure your dose

Looking after yourself after a session

To help your mind and body recover, you could try to:

• take regular breaks from chems - regular use increases your risk of becoming dependent
• get enough sleep or rest
• talk to someone you trust about how you feel if you had a negative experience or witnessed something that worries you
• do some physical activity - it releases chemicals in your brain that improve your mood (endorphins)
• do some exercises to manage stress, anxiety and worry
• find activities with other people that improve your mental health
• get medical advice if you have thoughts or feelings that worry you
• get tested for STIs and other infections

Avoid using drugs to cope with comedowns or negative feelings.

If you're worried about sex without chems

If you're worried about sex or intimacy without chems, it may help to think about:

• times you enjoyed sex without chems
• times you were close or intimate with someone without chems
• anything you want to change - for example, reducing how often you do chemsex

Talk therapy can help if you want to have sex and intimacy without chems but find it difficult or you do not know where to start.

When to get help for sex and drugs

You can get help if you are worried about your:

• use of drugs
• mental or physical health
• sexual health or STIs
• sex life or sexual function

If you go to a GP or STI clinic, it's best to tell them about any drug use. It will help them to recommend the right treatment.

Getting help for drug use

If you are worried about someone else

Chemsex support

If you are worried about your relationship with chemsex, specialised services are available.

They include healthcare professionals and people with lived experience of chemsex.

Club drug clinic

Our club drug clinic helps with safe detox off G and crystal meth. It also provides psychological and social support to reduce the risk of relapse.

You need a referral from your GP or another healthcare professional to access the clinic.

The Switchboard Ireland

This is a confidential listening service for the LGBT+ community. LGBT+ volunteers are available 7 days a week on phone, email and online chat.

Volunteers trained in issues related to chemsex and substance use are available 6.30pm to 9pm on Thursdays.

Phone: 01 872 1055

WhatsApp: 089 2674777

Email: ask@theswitchboard.ie

www.theswitchboard.ie

MPOWER

Services to improve the sexual health and wellbeing of gay, bisexual and men who have sex with men (gbMSM).

The team is available to speak to you by phone, email, WhatsApp and Zoom.

Phone: 01 873 3799
10 am to 5pm, Monday to Friday

Email: mpower@hivireland.ie

mpower.hivireland.ie