Feeling lonely can be difficult, but there are steps you can take to feel more connected and supported. Small actions can make a meaningful difference over time.
There are lots of ways to deal with loneliness and isolation. The solution depends on what's causing these feelings.
For example, if you've moved out of home or to a different country, it's natural you'll feel lonely at first.
How to deal with loneliness
Here are some ideas that may help.
Know your loneliness is normal
Loneliness is a part of being human.
Most people have periods of loneliness at different times in life. Feeling lonely does not mean there’s anything wrong with you. It’s a normal emotional response to feeling disconnected or unsupported.
Some life changes can bring up feelings of loneliness.
For example:
- leaving secondary school or college to start something new can feel overwhelming and uncertain
- parenting on your own can feel isolating
- being out of work can bring stress and uncertainty and leave you feeling cut off from others
- moving out of home or to a different country can feel lonely at first
Whatever the reason, your experience is valid. Reaching out, talking about how you feel, and knowing you’re not alone can be the first steps toward feeling more supported.
Build your self-esteem
Low self-esteem can make social situations feel more challenging. When you're not feeling confident, meeting new people or joining in can feel stressful.
One helpful approach is to focus on small achievable goals. Doing things that give you a sense of accomplishment, even in small steps, can help build your confidence over time.
Be kind to yourself as you go, and recognise the effort you’re making. Every step forward counts.
Ways to build your self-confidence
Find things to do
Finding things to do can help ease feelings of loneliness. When we have structure and purpose in our day, it can create a sense of connection and meaning.
If you’re feeling bored or are between jobs, consider volunteering with a cause or organisation that matters to you. Getting involved, even in a small way, can help you feel valued and part of something bigger.
Do things you enjoy
Taking time to explore what you enjoy can be a way to reconnect with yourself and others. When you feel lonely, doing something that sparks your interest can lift your mood and help you feel more grounded.
You do not need to have a big passion or talent in mind. Start with curiosity. Maybe there’s a hobby you used to enjoy, something you’ve always wanted to try, or a new activity that sounds interesting.
You might:
- join a local class or group - such as art, music, walking, or fitness
- try creative activities at home - like writing, cooking, gardening, or crafts
- visit a library, gallery, or community centre to see what’s happening in your area
- explore podcasts, books, or online resources related to things that interest you
Engaging in something you enjoy can also open up chances to meet others with similar interests. Take it at your own pace. Exploring your interests is a form of self-care, not a task to complete.
Finding activities to do with others
Enjoy your own company
Being alone does not always have to mean feeling lonely. Some of the most peaceful and powerful moments come when you’re just with yourself.
Try doing something you can enjoy on your own, such as listening to music, drawing, walking, or writing a journal.
Over time, you might find that your own company can be calming, creative, and even fun. Learning to enjoy being by yourself builds confidence, self-trust, and inner strength.
Improve your mood by doing something creative
Try not to worry
It’s easy to start overthinking when you’re feeling left out or alone.
But loneliness does not mean you’re unlikable or broken - it means you are human.
Remind yourself that feelings come and go, and this one will pass too.
It’s OK to feel lonely - and it’s also OK to hold onto hope that connection will come.
Mind yourself
When you’re feeling lonely, it’s easy to reach for connection wherever you can find it, especially online. But it’s important to look after your mental and emotional safety while you’re trying to feel less alone.
Avoid taking social media too seriously
Social media can make it seem like everyone else is constantly surrounded by friends or living perfect lives. Remember, people often only share the highlights, not the hard stuff. You’re not the only one struggling, even if it looks that way.
Be wary of certain online groups or forums
Some spaces can offer support, but others might encourage unhealthy habits or make you feel worse. If something does not feel right, trust your gut (instinct).
Try not to spend too much time using the internet
Scrolling or using the internet can sometimes deepen feelings of isolation. Balance your screen time with small real-life activities. This could be stepping outside, talking to someone in person, or doing something creative.
Build trust slowly
If you’re meeting new people, go at your own pace. Healthy friendships take time. You do not have to share everything right away. Take things step by step and notice how you feel in someone’s company over time.
Above all, remind yourself that being cautious does not mean closing yourself off. It means respecting yourself enough to protect your wellbeing while you open up to connection.
How to meet people and make new friends - spunout.ie
How to make friends as an adult - spunout.ie
When to get help
If loneliness feels overwhelming or starts to affect your daily life, it’s important to reach out for support.
You might consider getting help if:
- you feel low, anxious, or hopeless most of the time
- you’re withdrawing further from people or activities you used to enjoy
- you feel like you cannot cope, or have thoughts of self-harm
Talk to your GP. They can help you explore what’s going on and connect you with suitable support.
You can also:
- contact a mental health professional or counselling service
- phone the Samaritans on freephone 116 123 - this is available 24/7, free and confidential
Loneliness is something many people experience at different times in life. With the right support and small steps, things can improve.
More support
You can also find support for:
- older people who feel alone and isolated through Alone
- single parents who are feeling isolated through Parentline
- connecting with other people if you are moving into a new area through Meetup