After a miscarriage - Miscarriage

A miscarriage can have a deep emotional impact on you and also on your partner, friends and family.

Advice and support are available during this difficult time.

Physical recovery after miscarriage

Recovery after miscarriage can depend on:

• whether you had an early or late miscarriage
• the treatment you had, if any
• if you had complications

Most women with miscarriages under 12 weeks do not need follow-up care.

If you had a late miscarriage, you will be given a follow-up appointment.

While you recover, it is normal to have some:

• bleeding from your vagina - for about 7 to 10 days
• stomach cramps and pain

After a late miscarriage

If you had a miscarriage between 12 and 24 weeks, you may:

• have some bleeding and pain - this can last for a few weeks
• have tender breasts
• start to produce breast milk - this can be uncomfortable, upsetting and sometimes painful

Talk to your GP if you have any of these symptoms. They may suggest painkillers or medicine to stop you from producing milk.

Wear a well-supporting bra and use breast pads to soak up any leaking milk.

Follow-up after a late miscarriage

If you had a late miscarriage you will have a follow-up appointment. This may be at a specialist clinic.

At this appointment, your doctor may discuss:

• what happened and try to answer any questions you may have
• the results of any tests you had
• the risk factors for miscarriage
• plans for future pregnancies

You might like to ask them about emotional supports and services that can help.

When to get medical help

If you have any medical concerns after you have a miscarriage, contact your healthcare professional. This may be your GP, the hospital or the early pregnancy assessment unit (EPAU).

Tiredness

You may feel exhausted. Rest for a few days, if you can. You will probably feel emotional and tired for weeks.

Return to work

When to return to work will depend on how you are feeling. Talk to your GP if your tiredness does not improve.

Ask them for a sick certificate for work, if you need it.

You are not legally entitled to specific paid leave if you have a miscarriage. But most people take sick leave.

Some workplaces have supports in place for people who have a pregnancy loss.

These include:

• compassionate or pregnancy loss leave
• flexible working arrangements or adjustments
• counselling - for example, through an employee assistance programme

You may decide not to tell your workplace about your miscarriage. Do what you feel is right for you.

Emotional recovery after miscarriage

A miscarriage can be devastating for you and your partner. Strong emotions may come and go.

Feelings such as guilt, shock and anger are common. There is no right or wrong way to feel after a miscarriage. Your partner's ways of coping may not be the same as yours.

It is important to look after your mental health. It can be helpful to share how you feel with someone you trust - such as your partner, friend or family member.

Give yourself time to grieve and heal. Anxiety is common after a miscarriage. Or you may feel low for a while.

Talk to your GP if you feel you are not coping with daily life. They may refer you for counselling or recommend a short course of medicine.

Coping with grief

Managing anxiety

How your partner feels

Miscarriage can be a very difficult experience for couples. A partner’s feelings can often be overlooked. Sometimes people think a partner is less affected and needs to stay strong.

They have not gone through the physical trauma of miscarriage. But they too have experienced a loss.

Find time and space together to talk about your experiences and feelings.

Your GP or hospital can offer support to you both. They can refer you for private counselling if you need it. You may have to pay for counselling services.

Getting support

You may need a lot of support after a miscarriage. Share how you feel with your partner, family or friends.

The hospital will have supports available such as:

• a clinical midwife specialist in bereavement and loss
• chaplaincy or pastoral care
• medical social worker

Your GP can also support you during your physical and emotional recovery.

You can also get support from:

• Pregnancy and Infant Loss Ireland
• Bereavement support and services
• The Miscarriage Association of Ireland

Marking a pregnancy loss

Miscarriage in your first 12 weeks of pregnancy is different to a later miscarriage as there is often no funeral or burial. Emotionally, it can be helpful to acknowledge and mark your pregnancy loss.

Some people like to:

• plant a tree
• light a candle
• go on a trip

After a later miscarriage, you might like to have a photograph or create a memory box with scans or other things from your pregnancy.

Dealing with your loss is a personal thing. There is no right or wrong way to do it.

You decide what’s best for you.

Later loss - after the birth

Pregnancy loss remembrance service

All maternity hospitals or units and support organisations hold remembrance services each year. These are for people who have a pregnancy loss or death of a baby.

This can be an opportunity to acknowledge the loss of your pregnancy. You may also feel comfort in being with others who had a pregnancy loss.

Sex after miscarriage

You can have sex again as soon as you feel ready. But it may be best to wait until the pain and bleeding have gone completely.

It is possible to get pregnant in the first month after a miscarriage - even before your period returns. Talk to your GP about contraception if you want to avoid getting pregnant straight away.

Getting pregnant after a miscarriage

Many women who have a miscarriage worry they'll have another if they get pregnant again. But most miscarriages are a one-off.

It is normal to feel anxious about another pregnancy. Sometimes it helps to talk to someone who had a pregnancy loss and became pregnant again.

If you want to get pregnant again, talk to your GP or midwife when you feel up to it. They may ask you about your physical and emotional recovery.

There is usually no right or wrong time to try for another baby. But your GP or midwife may advise you to wait until you have at least 1 period before trying again.

If you had a late miscarriage, talk to your GP before trying for a baby again. They will help you plan your next pregnancy. Your doctor or midwife will also talk to you about this at your follow-up appointment.

Healthy pregnancy after miscarriage

After a miscarriage, most women go on to have a healthy pregnancy.

Having 1 or 2 miscarriages does not mean you are at higher risk for miscarriage in the future.

You will not usually have any tests or investigations unless you have had at least 2 miscarriages in a row. The loss of 2 or more pregnancies in the first trimester is called recurrent miscarriage.