Every parent finds parenting difficult. There can be days when it feels like everything is a struggle.
Be kind to yourself. It's important to look after yourself too.
Some of these tips might be helpful for you.
Difficult days parents have (video)
Boundaries for difficult days
Boundaries are a set of rules and guidelines that help your child understand what behaviour is acceptable, and what isn't. They are our way of letting children know how to be in the world.
Setting fair and reasonable boundaries is important. They let children know what you expect from them. They can help a child feel safe.
Children will push boundaries. Its part of normal development and learning about relationships. Do not to take it personally.
Try for a fresh start
If you're having a difficult day, try to take a moment and check in on yourself.
Try not to take your child's behaviour personally. When children are upset they can say and do things they do not mean.
Try and do a restart. Focusing on your child's positive behaviour may be helpful.
Tune into your child
Every child is different. Some children are quiet and will love playing with puzzles and jigsaws. Other children have high energy and need to run around a lot.
Some children find busy places difficult. They may show you how they are feeling instead of telling you with words.
Connect with your child over shared interests and things they like.
Let your children make decisions
You can do too much for your child. Some will fight for their independence. Others will allow you to do everything for them.
Give your child the space to make mistakes and learn from them. This will support their independence and confidence.
How you speak about your child
Be careful how you speak about your child in front of your child. They are always listening.
Children will live up to both high and low expectations.
Say sorry
It's OK to say "I'm having a bad day. I'm sorry that I shouted at you. I love you."
This sets a good example for your child. They will learn to say sorry too.
Pick your battles
Do not try to change everything. Small changes can make a big difference. Celebrate the small wins.
Problem-solving
Children are always learning from how we cope with problems or mistakes along the way.
Get them to help you with small jobs or problems around the house. Talk them through how you solve problems.
This will teach them problem-solving skills early in life. Praise them for solving smaller problems with your help.
Social media and screen time
Make an effort to limit social media and screen time daily. Make this a family rule.
Limit the use of social media and screens around your children. It can stop you from bonding with your child.
Do not compare yourself to others on social media. Families that look perfect on social media posts also have bad days.
Screen time is any time spent looking at a screen. Screens can be smartphones, gaming devices, tablets, computers and TVs.
Make time for yourself
You deserve some free time for relaxation or fun. Being kind to yourself teaches children the importance of self-care.
Here are some tips that might help you make time for yourself:
- do not worry about keeping the perfect home - cleaning can wait if you need a break
- try not to cook meals from scratch every day - batch cook in advance or use leftovers for meals
- ask your partner or friends and family to help you free up some time, if you can
- do not feel guilty for leaving your child with a childminder or in a creche - you know they are being well looked after
More support and advice
You can get support if you're finding parenting difficult.
Non-urgent advice: Contact your GP or public health nurse if:
- you feel that one bad day has turned into a bad week or month
They will guide you to services that can support you.
Find a list of parenting helplines and courses at gov.ie.
Read our guide on parenting advice and getting support.