Bullying and autism

Many autistic children and young people experience bullying. It can affect their mental and emotional health as well as school attendance.

What is bullying

Bullying is any behaviour that makes someone feel scared, upset, or hurt. It can be physical, verbal, or emotional. It can often happen in school, at work, or online (cyberbullying).

Common types of bullying include:

• verbal - it happens face-to-face, written or over the phone
• physical - such as being tripped, kicked and having things stolen or damaged
• social - being left out, ignored or having rumours spread about you
• psychological - being intimidated or getting dirty looks

Types of bullying and harassment

Why autistic children and young people are at risk

Autistic children and young people can be more at risk of bullying than their peers. This is because they communicate, behave and interact with others differently.

Sometimes, people with autism might have trouble understanding social situations. They may not fully understand facial expressions or body language. They may also show different behaviours such as hand flapping (stimming).

Signs your autistic child is being bullied

It can be difficult to know if your child is being bullied. They may not realise that they are being bullied. This is because they may have trouble understanding what other people mean. Their communication issues can also make it hard for them to tell you or a teacher what's happening.

If your autistic child is being bullied in school they may:

• come home with bruises or scratches
• have damaged or missing clothes, bags or books
• not have the money they should have
• be late getting to school or coming home because they have changed their route
• refuse or be reluctant to go to school
• seem anxious, depressed, or unwell
• show a drop in concentration or quality of their schoolwork
• have issues with eating or overeating
• show a sudden increase or change in obsessive or repetitive behaviours

If you think your child is being bullied

There are actions you can take. You can:

Talk to your child

• try to stay calm and listen to them carefully
• let your child know you believe them and it's not their fault
• help your child write or tell you about their experience
• ask them what they want to happen
• agree the next steps with your child

Talk to the school

Report the bullying to the school, special needs assistants, teachers, and principal.

Ask the school about:

• their anti-bullying policy
• what they can do to address the issue
• how they can help prevent it happening again
• if there is anything practical you can do to help

Coping strategies

Autistic students can learn how to deal with bullying with support from families, special needs assistants and teachers. This can help them learn to recognise bullying and know what they can do.

You can:

• help your child identify where they feel most and least safe
• teach your child what to do if something at school makes them upset
• ask the school about structured activities for your child at play time
• help your child understand if someone is being kind or mean

Cyberbullying

Cyberbullying is when someone uses technology to hurt or upset others on purpose. This can be through social media, forums, email, texting or gaming.

If your autistic child is being cyberbullied, they may:

• show sudden changes in behaviour
• be reluctant to use the computer or phone
• be reluctant to show their computer or phone screen
• be on their computer or phone non-stop
• have unwanted or excessive message notifications
• show changes in their self-esteem or confidence

Protecting your child from cyberbullying

Find out about cyberbullying and how to deal with it.